Step 1: Cook the Pasta. Bring a large pot of water to a rolling boil and season generously with salt; the water should taste like sea water. Add the penne or rigatoni and cook according to package directions until al dente—firm to the bite but cooked through. Drain and set aside, reserving a small ladle of pasta water in case you need to loosen the sauce later.
Step 2: Brown the Sausage and Bacon. In a large skillet over medium-high heat, warm 1 tablespoon of olive oil. Add the chopped turkey bacon and sausage rounds, stirring occasionally for about 4–5 minutes, until lightly browned and their fat begins to render. Transfer the cooked meats to a plate and leave the drippings in the pan to flavor the chicken.
Step 3: Sauté the Chicken. Add the remaining 1 tablespoon of olive oil to the skillet. Season the bite-sized chicken pieces with a pinch of salt and pepper, then add them to the hot pan. Cook for 6–7 minutes, stirring occasionally, until no pink remains and each piece has a golden sear. Transfer the chicken to the plate with the sausage and bacon.
Step 4: Build the Sauce Base. Reduce the heat to medium. Melt the 2 tablespoons of butter in the same skillet, scraping up any browned bits from the proteins. Add the chopped onion and cook for 3–4 minutes, until translucent. Stir in the minced garlic and ¼ teaspoon of smoked paprika, cooking for 30 seconds or until fragrant—this aromatic base will infuse your sauce with depth.
Step 5: Add Liquids and Simmer. Pour in the 1 cup chicken broth and 1 cup heavy cream to the skillet with the sautéed onions and garlic. Increase heat to medium–high and bring the mixture to a gentle simmer, scraping up any browned bits from the bottom of the pan. Allow it to bubble for 2–3 minutes so it reduces slightly and begins to thicken.
Step 6: Melt in the Cheeses. Reduce the heat to low and gradually stir in the 1½ cups Pepper Jack cheese and ½ cup sharp cheddar, a handful at a time. Whisk constantly until each addition is fully melted and the sauce turns smooth and velvety. Taste and adjust seasoning with salt and freshly ground black pepper, keeping in mind that the cheeses and broth carry their own salt content.
Step 7: Reunite the Proteins. Return the plate of browned chicken, sausage, and turkey bacon to the skillet, along with the ½ cup diced chicken ham. Gently stir to incorporate, allowing the meat to warm through in the sauce for about 1 minute.
Step 8: Fold in the Pasta. Add the drained penne or rigatoni directly to the skillet. Using tongs or a large spoon, toss the pasta in the sauce until every piece is coated in the creamy, spicy cheese. If the sauce seems too thick, add a splash of reserved pasta cooking water to reach your desired consistency.
Step 9: Heat Through and Finish. Continue cooking for an additional 1–2 minutes, stirring occasionally, until the pasta is heated through and the sauce clings beautifully to every ridged surface. Taste once more and correct the seasoning if necessary.
Step 10: Plate and Garnish. Divide the pasta among warm bowls or plates. Sprinkle each portion with 2 tablespoons chopped fresh parsley for color and freshness. If you can’t resist extra heat, scatter a bit more shredded Pepper Jack on top so it melts into the sauce’s final warmth.